The Uniform
by Emom
Summary: Johnny is convinced that he will be the next Code F in the stations new uniform.
1. Chapter 1

The Uniform

_These good fellows don't belong to me but I promise when I'm done to pick um up, dust um off and with a kiss on the cheek return them safely home._

"_Blue flowers, red thorns! Blue flowers, red thorns! Blue flowers, red thorns! Oh, this would be so much easier if I wasn't color blind." Donkey._

* * *

Chapter 1

Chet stood just outside the locker room door and waited. Patiently. Should be any minute now.

"CHETTT!"

Without hesitation he went running into the dayroom and sat down quickly at the table with his Captain looking up at him.

"Do we have a problem?" Hank asked.

"No Cap. I'm fine," Chet said with a smile as he smoothed down his uniform shirt with his hands.

Hank just grumbled.

It didn't take long for the rest of the crew to make their way into the kitchen, including a highly ill tempered dark headed medic who seemed to be squishing.

Hank looked down at his feet, "Hard to sneak up on a fire making that much noise Gage."

Johnny just growled, "Tell Chet to quit putting stuff in my shoes. Look at this, chocolate pudding and this is my last good pair. My others are still drying out from the jello last shift." He moved over to the counter and grumbled as he poured his coffee.

Mike looked at the man's shoes, "Better with whipped cream."

Johnny shot him a look but chose to remain quiet. His beef was with Chet, not Mike.

Hank hid a smile and shook his head. He learned a long time ago to not get in the middle of the phantom and his pigeon as long as things were tame in nature. "Okay fellows, meeting in 5 minutes. I have a new announcement and we need to go over the training exercise that's this afternoon.

They acknowledged their Captain with an as sundry of "Yes sir's, aye Caps and sure things" as he left the dayroom and headed to his office.

Johnny sat down next to Roy as he seemed intent on something in the paper. "What's so interesting there partner?"

Roy quickly closed the paper only hoping that Johnny didn't see what he was looking at. "Nothing, just reading the paper." He looked to see Johnny wrinkling up those brows of his. Never a good sign.

"Uh... huh," he said as he slowly slid the paper away from Roy and casually picked it up. As he flipped through the pages he tried to see what might have been so interesting but nothing jumped out at him.

Roy stood up and poured his coffee out then after washing it out he put it up in the cabinet. Glancing back he saw Johnny watching him. "What?"

"Nothing," he said as he turned back to the paper. "Just reading the paper."

Mike looked up to see Roy give an exasperated sigh. Obviously something was bothering the senior medic but everyone knew that there was only one person to get it out of him by the end of the shift.

They all looked up to see Cap come back into the room with a box. Brown and inconspicuous he held it close to him. "Okay, come on you guys. Let's get this over with." Hank dreaded doing this. The men wouldn't take it well. They were just too much creatures of habit and routine.

They all grabbed a chair and pulled it up to the chalkboard giving him their attention and brewing interest in the package.

"Alright. As you know we have a district wide training session this afternoon. But this one is going to be a little different than ones in the past." He paused to let them quit squirming in their seats. "This one is going to be huge. Headquarters is pulling in ten stations and all available squads. We're taking that old warehouse over on Harbor Drive."

They all knew the area well. They recently had been called to a fire in that area and many buildings there had been abandoned. There was plenty of room and plenty of water available for them to train with.

"We have one, um, a new piece of equipment we are required to try out for this exercise." He put the box down and opened it up but didn't show was it held.

They craned their necks trying to see what was so disconcerting in the box to their fearless leader.

"Headquarters is trying out some new uniforms. They want to change the county over to this but are meeting some opposition so far."

They were very confused now.

"I have two new shirts that will have to be worn in place of your regular uniform for this training session. They want to check it out in action, its visibility guess you might say."

"Why just two Cap? Why not just change uniforms?" Roy asked not understanding the big deal over a uniform change.

"There are plenty who are fighting the change. It's not our job to judge them or even get a vote right now. We are just wearing them for the exercise and that's all. Every station is getting the same box." He reached into his front pocket and pulled out cut straws. "Okay short draws the shirts."

The men looked at each other. Cap was acting very strange about this. Drawing straws? Were they really that bad that no one would volunteer to wear them?

"Can't we just volunteer Cap?" Marco asked.

Hank took a deep breath and put the straws down. "Okay." He pulled out the shirt and held it up. "I need two volunteers."

Johnny jumped up out of his chair practically knocking it over, all the time backing up and waving his hands, "You have to be kidding me? Are they crazy?"

Mike shook his head. Not quite as dramatic as Johnny but his displeasure was obvious on his face, "Cap, they're kidding right? They expect us to wear that?"

Hank simply put the shirt down and picked the straws back up. He chose to ignore the rumbling amongst the crowd and shoved the straws in their faces. "Just draw a damn straw."

Roy reached first, followed by Johnny, Marco, Mike and finally Chet.

"Ahh man! That's not right!" Chet complained right off the bat as he looked at his short straw. He looked at the others to see who his partner would be and grinned.

"Don't say a word Chet. I'm telling ya right now. Not a word." Johnny took the shirt from Hank and stomped to the locker room to change.

Roy chuckled to himself, "This is going to be a long day Cap."

Hank just shook his head, "You're telling me."


	2. Chapter 2

The Uniform

_These good fellows don't belong to me but I promise when I'm done to pick um up, dust um off and with a kiss on the cheek return them safely home._

"Ever hear the saying..._Curiosity killed the cat?"_

_Glad you're enjoying this one. Thanks for letting me know what you think!_

* * *

Chapter 2

The men walked down the hall and caught Dixie's attention right away. She was curious of course as to why they were dressed differently. The look on Johnny's face told that he was not happy about it.

"Fellows? What's up with the new shirt?" She leaned against the desk.

"Just a new shirt the department is making us try out," Roy said as he passed the supply list to her.

She smiled at Johnny knowing exactly what he was thinking, "Draw the short straw Johnny?"

"Cute Dixie. I look like a big giant target don't I?" He grumbled as he tugged on the tight collar around his neck. Why couldn't it be button down like the other one?

"I don't know Roy. I think it brings out his eyes but are you sure you want to take him out on a rescue dressed in that? He visits the ER enough as it is." She giggled.

Roy looked between the two, "Don't egg him on Dix, he's bad enough as it is right now. He's convinced he's going to die in that shirt."

"You just wait. I'm gonna be a code F," he said wagging his finger.

Brackett walked up and was a little unnerved by the Code F conversation. Johnny wound up in the ER enough as it was. "What's this about a Code F?"

Roy waved him off, "Nothing doc. We're on our way to a district wide exercise. Johnny's convinced he's going to be one of the injured."

"I'll be lucky _if_ I'm injured. More like dead."

"Johnny, it's just a drill. Will you please calm down?" Roy begged him.

Dixie laughed even though Brackett seemed lost. She looked at him, "I'll tell you in a minute Kel." She had a nephew and knew why Johnny was all worked up.

Roy grabbed the supplies, "Thanks Dix. Wish us luck."

* * *

They drove to the warehouse but Johnny's curiousity was getting the better of him. "Okay, you going to tell me what's wrong or do I have to spend all day figuring it out?"

Roy looked at his partner and his new uniform. "You might not live all day, remember."

"Very funny Roy. What's up with you today? You seem, I don't know, like you're up to something." Johnny shifted sideways in his seat to watch his partner.

"Johnny, I'm not up to anything. I'm just driving. And you're distracting me."

Johnny moved around to face the window. He wasn't giving up yet. "So. What did you and Kanda do this weekend?"

Roy shifted in his seat, "I didn't see her this weekend."

"What? I thought you guys had a date this weekend?" Johnny was concerned now. "What happened?"

"Joanne happened." Roy really didn't want to talk about it. Everytime he tried to plan something with Kanda it was his ex wife that managed to mess it up. Once, just once he begged for a date uninterrupted. He had yet to get Kanda alone, to himself, no kids, no phone calls, and yes, no Johnny.

There was no way it was going to end there, "Exactly what happened?"

"Not what you're thinking. She just keeps calling me to fix things at her place. I'm just trying to find her, well…"

"A handyman?" Johnny ventured.

"Something like that."

Johnny laughed. Roy trying to set up his ex-wife. "Were you looking in the paper for personal ads?"

"I don't want to talk about it anymore."

Johnny laughed again. "Now, Roy. Maybe I can help. I've got friends."

Roy turned in his seat, "No, no, no. You just stay out of this Johnny. I'm telling you right now."

His grin widened. "Alright partner, calm down."

"Can't believe we're even talking about it. Just drop it," Roy said as he pulled up to the parking lot which was now full of engines and squads. He parked and got out of the squad then moved to the front to meet Johnny. Turning to him, "Not a word. Do you hear me? You will live to regret it."

Holding his hands up, "Fine, fine. Not a word."

* * *

"Alright men. This will be run as a four alarm fire," the battalion chief called through the megaphone. "The monitors are marked. They will be assigned to each station and you are to follow their every instruction through this. Let's get started." This had been planned for months, every detail meticiously covered.

Everyone heard the tones come across the radio announcing the start of the exercise. Since the building was abandoned all squad personnel were working the hoses for this. Hank started yelling out instructions, "Lopez and DeSoto, two and a half inch, take the right entrance." They nodded and gathered up supplies. Each man put on his tanks and masks as they could now see the smoke coming from the building. "Gage and Kelly, enter through the south bay doors." They also took off at a run to get their supplies. Hank didn't like separating his crew. He cringed watching Johnny and Chet in the new uniform as they pulled on their turnout coats and tanks.

As they pulled the lines forward Hank heard the call for the line charge over the HT. Waving at Mike he watched the highly competent engineer do his job and provide the water to his crew. They entered the massive building knowing that it wasn't raging with fire but instead was highly selectively lit to flame for the exercise. The obvious goal was to train and not get hurt. The monitors followed the crews as they fought the flames, taking note of what they were doing, and how they were doing it.

Marco took the lead with Roy backing him up as they broke through the door, entered the building, and went up the stairs. They were greeted with thick black smoke but not flames yet. Marco looked up and down the walls trying to find a hint as to where it was hiding. Roy pulled the hose up behind him while checking doors, one at a time. Once in he did a rapid search of the room then rejoined Marco in the hall. As they progressed down the hallway the visibility got worse and Roy placed his hand on Marco's shoulder.

"Dead end," Marco yelled through the thick mask as they reached the end of the hallway.

Roy nodded and pointed up for the next floor. They headed back to the stairs with a growing anxiety about this drill. The danger in this building was still real. Roy's HT went off.

"Kelly to HT."

Hanks voice came across, "Cap, we need some backup here. Third floor, south side door."

"On the way Kelly," Hank said. "HT to Lopez."

Marco took out his radio and paused, "Lopez."

"Head to the south end, back up Gage and Kelly."

"10-4."

Marco looked back to his worried partner, "Let's go."

The two men knew the floor plan of the building and went back down to the third floor and headed south knowing it would connect them directly. Within a few hundred feet they were knocked down by a resounding explosion that knocked them to the ground.

Roy shook his head, momentarily stunned by the impact. "Marco, you okay?" He asked as he regained his footing. Quickly assessing himself to find no major injuries he instinctively turned to make sure Marco was okay.

"Yea, what the hell was that?" Marco said as he stood up and shook off the debris from his turnout pants.

"I don't know," he said as he picked up his HT. "51 to HT."

"Roy you two alright?" Hanks concerned voice came across.

"Yea Cap but we're just a few hundred feet down from where Johnny and Chet should be."

Hank changed tactics. "HT to Kelly." He got no response. "HT to Kelly, do you read?"

"Here Cap…we're down…need…help."

McConnikee came jogging up to Hank, "Your men alright Hank?"

"I've got two down on the south side. What was that?" Hank said. There was no way for him to know if the loud sound from the building was planned or not.

"Let's get um out of there." The chief took his HT and began barking orders to get men out of the south end of the building. He watched a man emerge immediately from the building with another fireman draped over his shoulder. Two medics ran up to him and laid him down on a yellow blanket. They were quickly followed by many other men coming out of the building, coughing, dirty and tired. The chief watched the injured area grow larger and was dismayed to see four men now tagged as Code F's. This excercise was not going as he had hoped but he wasn't sure why at this point.

* * *

Chet leaned against the wall and waited. Johnny was lying down next to him. The smoke was around them but thinning.

"So what's for dinner tonight Chet?" Johnny asked.

"Depends on if I live or not. If they kill me off then I refuse to cook," Chet said as he looked up at the monitor standing nearby.

"Don't know if Cap will see it that way," Johnny chuckled. "No, my luck it will be me. But at least it won't be a trip to Rampart," Johnny said as he took his gloves off and wiped the sweat from his brow.

"Well, Johnny boy the day is young. Don't count it out yet. You still have the shirt," he said with a chuckle.

"Are you kidding, this thing is coming off as soon as this is over with." Johnny looked around, "That explosion was a little too close if you ask me. This is supposed to be a training exercise right?"

"At least Roy and Marco sounded fine," Chet said. "Hey Johnny?"

"Yea?"

"What's up with Roy today?"

"Can't say."

Chet knew he would have to drag it out of him. "Can't say or won't say."

"Roy told me to not say anything," Johnny closed his eyes. Fake emergency or not his eyes were burning from the smoke now.

"Something's wrong between him and Kanda isn't it?" Chet probed.

"Nothing is wrong between them. Shut up Chet."

He was close. What could it be? "Kanda dumped him on the date this weekend didn't she?"

Johnny sat up on an elbow, "She did not dump him. They were going out until Joanne called." When he saw the smile on Chet's face he knew he had said too much. Roy would kill him. "Look Chet, it's not what you're thinking. Joanne is just calling him about the kids and stuff. It's just always bad timing."

"That witch needs to get a man."

This time Johnny smiled. Chet was smarter than he gave him credit for. "Exactly," Johnny said.

They both got silent as the footsteps quickly approached them. Johnny only prayed that Chet could keep his mouth shut.


	3. Chapter 3

The Uniform

_These good fellows don't belong to me but I promise when I'm done to pick um up, dust um off and with a kiss on the cheek return them safely home._

"_The issue is not whether you are paranoid, the issue is whether you are paranoid enough." Max._

* * *

Chapter 3

Roy knelt down and slipped off his mask, "You two alright." He knew it was a drill but it unnerved him to see his two friends on the floor of a burning building.

Chet groaned, "I hurt my leg but Johnny's hurt worse." He paused, "As usual."

Johnny rolled his eyes but held his tongue. He was critically injured you know.

Roy smirked, he knew the routine. "Did you hurt your neck or back?" He asked Chet.

Chet nodded no, just the leg. Assessing him as not critically injured he called to Marco, "You take him out and I'll get Johnny."

Roy helped him sling Chet over the shoulder in the fireman's hold and watched him head back down the hallway with Chet talking nonstop. He next turned his attention to his partner. "Where are you hurting?"

"Who are you?" Johnny asked in a pathetic voice.

Roy looked up at the monitor then back at his smart ass partner, "It's Roy. Do you know your name?"

"Roy."

"No, I'm Roy. What's your name?"

"You said my name was Roy. Why are you taking my name?"

Roy just sighed as he examined his head for injury, "Sounds like you might have a concussion. Are you hurt anywhere else?"

"My back hurts."

Roy reached back and felt down his neck, "Anywhere else?" He palpated his ribs and had to bear Johnny laughing at being tickled, then his abdomen.

"Ouch! Don't do that."

"Can you please behave so I can check you for injuries." He picked up the HT in an annoyed voice, "51 to HT. I need a backboard and C-collar up here."

"10-4 Roy," Hank replied.

"Are you going to take care of me?" Poor Johnny asked.

Roy was ready to grit his teeth by now. "Yea I'm gonna to take care of you. Now just sit back and shu…uh …be quiet for me."

"I think I'm going to throw up," Johnny sat up some.

Roy wasn't sure if he was kidding or not, "Try and be still. Moving around will only make it worse."

"I wanta be a fireman when I grow up too," Johnny said with a crooked grin.

"We'll don't worry Johnny you have plenty of years to try and grow up," Roy smiled back as he patted him on the head.

Johnny's face fell in a dramatic fashion, "Who's Johnny?"

"You're Johnny, don't you remember?" Where was that damn backboard and collar? An IV would be nice too about now. 16 gauge, yea.

"I'm Roy remember? Maybe that other man's name was Johnny?" Johnny continued his babbling.

Hank came up behind him with the equipment, "Here ya go Roy. Need anything else?"

Johnny smiled, "Thanks Cap."

Roy shot a look at him, "Oh him you remember."

"Sorry, a momentary lapse in amnesia," Johnny said with a crooked smile.

Roy rolled his eyes, "Cap, get his legs. I'll get his neck." They rolled him over and then positioned him onto the board after the c-collar was in place. Picking him up, they headed down the hall.

"Don't drop me now," Johnny warned.

"New therapy Johnny. It's called sliding down the stairs treatment." Roy didn't look back at him.

Johnny realized how venerable he was at the moment, "You wouldn't dare."

"Keep it up Junior and you will go on a ride."

Hank knew the monitor was observing them, "Will you two shut up."

"Sorry Cap," they said in unison.

Johnny was almost blinded by the bright sun as they emerged from the building and he quickly squinted his eyes and tried to put his hand up until he remembered he was still restrained. They put him down in the triage area and he could hear a lot of hustle bustle around him.

He looked and tried to turn his head but the c-collar was quite snug, thanks to Roy. Out of his peripheral vision he could see Roy tending to Chet. And they were talking. Roy shot a glare to Johnny.

Great. He closed his eyes trying to figure out how he would get back at Chet over this.

"Glad to see your pathetic broken body made it out of the blazing inferno pally," Chet said.

"See you didn't die, unfortunately," Johnny said.

"Nope but you might. You don't look so good buddy," Chet said as he knelt down and poked him.

"Ouch, quit poking," Johnny protested. "Okay, can I get up now?"

"Not yet partner. I have to triage you first," Roy said.

Johnny did not like the sound of Roy's voice. "Triage? Like what?"

Roy smiled a smile that scared Johnny, "Remember how I said I would take care of ya partner?" He looked up, "Marco, can you get my IV set up?"

"IV? No way! I'm not letting you stick me just for your jollies," Johnny started struggling against the restraints.

"He might need some sedation Roy," Hank said as he looked down on his poor crew member. Johnny noticed the biophone in his hand.

"Think you're right Cap. Better start a second IV just to be safe."

Hank added, "He did say his abdomen hurt didn't he?"

"That's very true Cap. Internal injuries," Roy poked at his belly.

"You're enjoying this aren't you? Let me up right now," Johnny was really struggling now.

"You don't want me to have to make this an order do you Gage?" Hank said in a serious tone.

"Aww Cap. Come on," Johnny whined.

Mike leaned over him next, "He _is_ an easier patient when he's unconscious."

"Should I knock him out Cap?" Marco asked.

"Now now, that wouldn't be proper first aid Lopez. I'm leaving this all up to our kind and compassionate well trained medic," Hank replied as he patted Roy on the shoulder.

"I'm not letting any of you touch me, get me UP!"

"Problem here DeSoto?" Chief asked walking up to the group.

Johnny froze at the Chief's voice then he came into his view.

"Got a non-compliant patient sir," Roy said trying not to laugh.

"Hmm, I see that. Can you intubate him please? He's making too much noise and disturbing the other victims," he said looking down to Johnny. "Take it easy son. We're gonna take good care of you. These men only want what's best for ya."

Johnny bit his lip and laid back. Fine. Roy would get his. Soon. He would have to let him up eventually.

They all broke out laughing at him and he felt his restraints loosened. He reached up and pulled off the c-collar. "Funny you guys, very funny." He looked over to Roy, "Just wait."

"Just wait for what? You and you're big mouth partner. Now I have to deal with Chet trying to set Joanne up with someone he knows."

"I'm sorry Roy. I didn't mean to tell him but he's, we'll he's tricky." Johnny said as he pulled off his turnout coat and remembered he was wearing the horrid uniform shirt. Being a near Code F was enough for him. This stupid shirt was cursed. He was sure of it.

Roy had to grin. It's not like his issues with his ex wife were a secret from this crew. Everyone got up and headed over by the engine. As they put up equipment Johnny looked at the triage area and his chin dropped.

"I told you! Didn't I tell you?" He said slapping Roy across the back and pointing.

Roy was lost, "What are you talking about now?"

"Look, just look." He saw Roy wasn't getting it. "Exactly what color of uniform do you see taking up the _entire _triage area?" He put his hands on his hips as he stood in front of Roy some to make sure his own shirt was seen. Then realizing Chet was close to him he snatched his arm and pulled him right beside him. His finger now pointing between him, Chet and the triage area. "Color Roy, what color do you see?"

Roy looked at the area and with sudden realization he then looked at Hank. Everyone's eyes then met the Chief's, standing in front of them, who just took a deep breath.

"Okay, okay I get it. I will put in my recommendation for no change in the uniform. At least not this one."

Roy patted Johnny on the shoulder as they walked away from the 'injured and numerous dead', everyone of them wearing the new _redshirts with black collars._

"Told ya, no one would listen to me but I was right wasn't I. Think I'm nuts but I knew didn't I. Lucky I wasn't a Code F in that mess. Target, didn't I say target? Big... giant... red... target. Yea, kill the guy in the red shirt. Am I the only one that knows that? Just go ahead and make um polyester while you're at it, with long sleeves. Red shirt, show up one day nobody knows who you are then poof your dead and never seen again…" Johnny continue to ramble on and on and on.

Roy took his partner by the shoulder as they walked to the squad.

"Okay Junior, you and Chris are officially grounded from watching Star Trek for a while."

AN: LOL, when I typed in Google search for redshirt it came up with an official definition of "the unknown guy in the redshirt on Star Trek that always seemed to die by the end of the episode."

END


End file.
